1. Mirror their body language
When we meet someone for the first time, we need to assess quickly whether they are positive or negative towards us. We do this by checking whether they ‘mirror’ our body language or not.
Mirroring is used as a way of bonding, being accepted, and creating rapport with others. Non-verbally, it says, ‘I am the same as you. I feel the same way and share the same attitudes.’
Mirroring makes other people feel ‘at ease’.
People who feel similar emotions and are on the same wavelength will match each other’s body language and expressions. And because of the phenomenon of cause and effect, if you intentionally mirror someone’s body language, you will be on the same wavelength with them. This is very crucial when trying to impress someone.
You can also take this a step further. Synchronize intonation, voice inflection, speed of speaking, and even accents while mirroring to further establish mutual attitudes.
Never speak at a faster pace than the other person. Studies show that others feel ‘pressured’ when someone speaks more quickly than they do. So, speak at the same rate or slightly slower than the other person.
2. Correct the position of your feet
The feet serve as pointers indicating the direction in which a person’s mind is going.
When trying to impress someone, point your feet towards while talking. This will show the other person that you are genuinely enjoying the conversation.
Note- You can also use this hack to know whether someone is interested in you or not.
3. Eye signals are crucial
Michael Argyle, a pioneer of social psychology and non-verbal communication skills, found that when person A likes person B, he will look at him a lot. This causes person B to think that person A likes him, so B will like A in return.
In other words, in order to build a good rapport with the other person, your gaze should meet theirs about 60 to 70% of the time. This will cause them to begin to like you.
4. Show them your palms
There are more connections between the brain and the hands than between any other body parts.
Throughout history, open palms have been associated with truth, honesty, and allegiance.
When you show your palms to others, it gives the other person an ‘intuitive’ feeling or hunch that you are telling the truth and completely honest about your feelings. And who doesn’t like honest people?
Palms are like the vocal cords of body language and putting them away is like keeping one’s mouth shut.
5. Build rapport using handshake
Hand shakes always need to be warm, friendly, and positive.
There are two main ingredients to a hand shake when trying to impress someone.
Firstly, you need to create a feeling of equality using your handshake.
You need to make sure that yours and the other person’s palms are in the vertical position so that no one is dominant or submissive.
Secondly, apply the same pressure you receive. Suppose that if on a firmness scale of 1-10, your handshake is a 7 but the other person is only a 5, you need to back off 20% in strength.
6. Use the magic of smile and laughter
Laughter has less to do with jokes and funny stories and more to do with bonding.
When you smile at another person they will almost always return the smile. This causes positive feelings in both you and the other person due to cause and effect.
Most encounters will run smoothly, last longer, and dramatically improve relationships when you make a point of regularly smiling and laughing to the point where it becomes a habit.
7. Point out the similarities
This hack is simple, yet very powerful.
The trick is to listen to the person you’re talking to and simply highlights the things that you have in common.
When you do so, the other person will think that you are more like them, hence from a psychological perspective, the brain will think that you are actually a nice person to hang out with.
You can also use it in a completely different way. Suppose, you are meeting someone and you both have a common friend. Now, here is what you should do. Just talk to the common friend and ask them about the likes and dislikes of the person you are going to meet.
Now, when you meet them, make sure to talk about the topic that both of you genuinely like.
Reverse-psychology at its best!
8. Meet strangers like meeting an old friend
The secret to making someone like you is by showing how much you like them.
When meeting someone, we think too much instead of responding with candid, un-selfconscious friendliness.
Now, answer this-
When is the only time we don’t worry about any shyness or negativity slipping out through our body language?
It is when we meet someone we love or feel comfortable with. We respond warmly from head to toe without a thought.
And that someone is none other than our dear, old friend.
Next time you meet someone, play a mental trick on yourself.
Just imagine that the person you are going to meet is an old friend, someone you had a wonderful relationship with years ago. But due to some unavoidable circumstances, you two got separated and you haven’t seen each other for years.
What a pleasant surprise!
After all these years, you two are united again. You are delighted.
Now, that is where the pretending game stops. Obviously, you won’t try to convince The Person that the two of you are really old friends.
But, it will be a different story inside. The joy of rediscovery fills your face and buoys up your body language. Such non-verbal cues will make the other person feel very special indeed.
9. Say their name while talking
Dale Carnegie once said:
“A person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.”
So, this sentence is more than enough to guess what I am going to say next.
If you want to leave an everlasting positive impression on someone, to make them feel valued, noticed, and important, just say their name during conversation.
10. Ask more questions
People love talking about themselves. I mean, who doesn’t? So, it is a no brainer that in order to make people talk about themselves, you should ask a lot of questions.
“But how do I ask a lot of questions?”, you say.
“Listen”, I reply.
You learn more by listening than by talking. Listening brings a lot more valuable information about the other person than talking. It will make others feel that they matter to you, you can sustain a sense of connection with them, and it helps you step out of your own frame of reference.
11. Ask the right questions
This one is just the continuation of previous hack.
Don’t just ask any type of question. Ask questions that elicit emotions in other people and put the brain into a state of excitement.
“What do you do?”
“Where are you from?”
“How long have you been here?”
Puts the brain into a point of low activity. Questions like these are never going to leave a long lasting good impression on someone. These questions are the generic ones; they won’t make you stand out.
And you all know that in order to stand out from the crowd, you will have to do things differently. Fortunately, in this case, you won’t have to make a lot of effort.
Ask questions like-
“What is your proudest moment?”
“Where do you see yourself in five years?”
“What is your greatest passion in life?”
When confused about what questions to ask, simply ask, “So what’s your story?”
Questions like these cause a release of dopamine in your brain because the other person would have to think before answering them.
Important fact- The more dopamine released during an interaction, the stronger the connection and memory becomes.
12. Check eye color for instant connection
Maintaining eye contact just a little longer than usual naturally increases your charm. When you meet someone for the first time, check their eye color for instant connection. This will not only allow you to maintain a strong eye contact but the extra one or two seconds you take to determine the color of their eyes will instantly make you more likable.
13. Go for adventure activities on a date
Your date is more likely to enjoy with you if he/she experiences some kind of adrenaline rush in your presence. And exciting situations do just the same thing, they release adrenaline. Ditch dinner and rom com; you should add activities like rafting, roller coaster ride, dining in the sky, and downhill mountain biking to your list of date ideas.
Your date will subconsciously associate you with the excitement experienced and feel like it was you, that made his/her adrenaline spike.
14. Nail the last impression
When we recall something, we do not play out the recollection minute by minute like a movie in our minds. They are more likely to remember the first and the last memories of the event or person.
So, when you are looking to impress someone, pay special attention to your last impression. Try your best to leave the other person with fond memories of your final interaction. It is likely that their memory of the entire event will be colored by that kick ass last impression you made.
15. Warm handshake equals better first impression
You must have this old saying – ‘Cold hands equal warm heart’. But scientific studies suggest that you are better off giving a warm handshake to someone you are trying to impress.
According to a study, people who have their hands warmed are kinder and more generous towards others and view other people in a more flattering light that they do when their hands are cold.
Now you know how to make a good first impression. Warm those hands by holding a cup of coffee or simply rubbing them together.